Next Stop: Atlantic

Just realized that I made a decision today. It happened spontaneously even though I had thought about it beforehand and then it just happened. Weird.

And something’s telling me it was the right one.

Guess my faith is back.

I think I experienced the difference between aquaintances and friends once again. That and the fact that a lot of people I deal with on a daily basis don’t know much about me.

Today something happened in a way that left me pissed off and disappointed and reminded me a lot of situations in a past that I have long left behind me. But then I am also extremely exhausted and too tired to fight or to get into arguments. Funny, how I had seen it coming though…

On the other hand I am really looking forward to seeing two friends who have been with me for all or at least a part of the past 10 years - Thomas and Stine a.k.a. Christine.

Talking to Thomas today and hearing the excitement in his voice that I’m soon going to be in NY just left me completely excited that I will soon be there. Same with Stine who I’ve been talking to frequently and who I can’t wait to see.

I am also looking forward to seeing Greg, the ex, hoping that it won’t be weird or painful or anything unpleasant.

And then the other ones… the one that I am still trying to figure out and the other ones who I haven’t spoken to in months. Hoping that one day all the weirdness will be gone and there’ll be just love and friendship and nothing else. And the certainty that you can rely on the other person no matter what. And they’ll still love you even if you fuck up badly.

Sometimes I just wish things and especially friendships were easier. That and that I could say what I’m thinking without driving people away.

Haha, Stine and I have issues - seems like we can’t keep any Skype conversation under two hours. I don’t care though as long as Skype is free and we don’t run out of things to talk about, like random adventures from my past that happened in other classrooms that she didn’t know of yet *gg* or the inability of most men to listen to women’s issues or problematic friendships of our pasts.

Quote of the night (sorry, if this makes only sense to Stine and me)

Me (talking about a particular person): I think I’m going to start playing games…
Stine (thinking board games): Cool!

Haha that was priceless…

There used to be a time when I was part of this community surrounding the 1Live radio/TV talkshow “Domian”. It must have been around the fall of 2001 when I discovered that I could listen to “Domian” over the internet - I remember I had dial-up internet then and the connection would stop like all the time or buffer endlessly but I could listen to my favorite radio show while eating dinner in Brooklyn. (The show runs from 1am to 2am, so I could watch it in NY thanks to the time difference.)

There’s a whole community on the internet around the show, so I joined the discussion board and at some point also the IRC-Chat #domian. Around 2002-2004 I was there a lot usually chatting while the show was on and met some pretty cool people (Flirtfaktor: 10), some of which am still in touch with. We had a lot of fun back then. Then I met Greg and stopped hanging out in that chatroom and when I moved back to Austria in 2004 I totally lost touch with the community.

This past year I started talking to people on the discussion board again but didn’t really get into it because there’s nobody I know there anymore and then there was this whole fiasco back in December where someone completely fucked with me and I left the board for months.

The chat had been pretty much dead until some dude decided to start a new chat and suddenly people were like, wait, there used to be an IRC-chat back in the days. That led to a discussion on the boards and suddenly people were curious and started showing up in #domian.

So last night I logged on and wouldn’t you know both nodrog and liane were there, who used to hang out back in the days. There were also two more users I knew and suddenly we were chatting like in the good old times. I had wanted to go to bed early and liane needed to get up at 5am but at some point we were, oh what the hell, and decided to hang out some more and listen to the show together like we used to do back then.

It was so weird but so cool at the same time… so much changed. Nodrog’s a teacher now too and liane’s kid is 11! And even though it felt like back in the days you could tell that everybody was just older, grown up in a way. We dug out some old jokes and shared some stories and then the show came on and we were like, “Oh. My. God” because Domian was wearing the shirt. See, there was this T-Shirt he would wear around 2001, it was pink with a white daisy on it (very gay) and while all the girls loved the shirt the guys hated it and there was even a discussion thread about the pink shirt on the boards. So he wore that shirt yesterday. It’s like we are watching the show 8 years later and are having this reunion online and Domian is wearing the same shirt he used to wear back the. How bizarre is that????

So yeah, good times and then it was 2am and the show ended and you could tell we’re old because within 3 minutes everyone was like “OK, I’m brushing me teeth” or “I’m going to bed” and at 2.05 everyone had logged out. Funny.

Those were some good times back then. So glad I got to talk to them last night - I love spontaneous stuff like that.

This weekend was pretty awesome. Friday night, while on the phone with Maiphone, I got a text message from my soul-sista Steph asking me if I was spontaneous and wanted to go see Lenny Kravitz Saturday night. See, Steph is currently working for Austria’s biggest hit-radio station and occasionally gets more tickets for concerts than she can use. When she heard there were tickets left for Lenny Kravitz, she called me up. How could I have said no? Even though I wasn’t a big fan of Lenny Kravitz (up until last night, he’s awesome) I liked his music enough to want to go. Plus, with Steph (and her boyfriend) it’s always good times.

Saturday I pretty much slept in, then chilled on the balcony (it was too cool to go to the lake) and at night we went to the concert. Crazy detail on the side: 15 minutes before Steph came to pick me up (roughty an hour before the concert started) she called telling me she had another ticket and I could ask someone to come - if I knew anybody who was that spontaneous and could be in Vienna in an hour. I tried several people who were either busy (Maiphone) or really didn’t like Lenny Kravitz (Gabi) or who didn’t listen to their voice mail (Martin) or who didn’t even have a voice mail and didn’t pick up (Eva, Jassi). The later it got, the more we tried finding people living closer to Vienna. Steph finally found someone who came with us and today I spoke to Martin who kept repeating “Scheisse, scheisse, scheisse!” (Shit in German) because he hadn’t felt like listening to his voice mail last night and would’ve totally come with us ’cause he loves Lenny. Oh well, too bad. Sucks though. I’m sure it would’ve been a blast with Martin.

We still had an awesome time. Even though I didn’t know a lot of the songs, Lenny kicked ass big time! Plus we just had a lot of fun chilling with some good drinks and dancing away to the cool music (we stood further in the back where there was plenty of room). Steph’s friends were really nice too. It was an overall awesome night.

Plus, it was finally a concert where I didn’t have to get up early the next morning…

So I slept in today, did a little bit of work, got some lunch ready - prosciutto, cantaloupe and bread sticks and rode the cruiser (music and all) to Ozean, my favorite local lake. Today finally felt like summer and it was packed there. It was still relaxing - I kept reading my book, had lunch, soaked up the sun and even went for a short swim in the very cold water. What more can I ask for?

At night I BBQed, watched some Everwood, cried a little in the process, made myself a Mojito and am now ready for bed. Pretty good, huh?

Spent almost the entire day in Vienna - first I had to go to the U.S. consulate and discovered that there’s more there than just the counter for the visas. Made me a little sad to see that the same guy who has handed out visas to me multiple times in the past still works there. Made me wish a little that I was there to pick one up too. Instead I handed over EUR41 to get 2 papers notarized and let me tell you: having stuff notarized at the consulate is a whole different story. In Brooklyn you enter some random store which sells stationary or office supplies and ask for the notary public who very often is an old Jewish guy. The guy just looks at the paper, an I.D., throws down a signature plus seal, you hand him 5-7 bucks and you’re done.

At the consulate you first have to surrender all your electronic devices before they scan your bag and you walk through the metal detector. Then you go to counter 2, hand them your paperwork through a slot and proceed to counter 3 where you can pay with cash or credit card. Then you wait until you get called at counter 2. There an old lady yells at you because you already signed the paper (dude, how was I supposed to know?), so she makes you sign a Post-It to verify the signature. Then you have to raise your right arm and swear before her that all the information was done to the best of your knowledge and is the truth. This is the first time I had to do this and part of me was like, what? Thankfully I had seen the guy in front of me doing it otherwise I might have been like “I need to do what?” I had a hard time keeping a straight face. In addition to the stamp the papers were sealed together and I was allowed to leave. Holy shit.

I then spent another EUR18 on postage to send the stuff registered, proof of receipt, blabla. If I’m lucky I will now have a pension from NY when I retire. Woo-hoo!

Then the fun part started and I met Gabi at Haas&Haas. As I entered the place I ran into 2 colleagues of mine form the main building. It figures. I go all the way to Vienna only to meet two other English teachers from Baden (the two had the same names as Gabi and me btw). Luckily I have mastered the art of saying hello and doing small talk and leaving after just enough time so it’s not rude and therefore was saved from awkward silence.

Gabi showed up shortly after and we shared some delicious tea sandwiches. Then we walked around aimlessly until I couldn’t stand all the masses of tourists anymore and we fled to Naschmarkt. We sat there for a while (Gabi ran into someone she knew), then stopped to buy some Falaffel and other Mediterranean goodies before heading home.

And while I did have a good time with her and the food was awesome and everything I have never missed Brooklyn more than now. Vienna was never my thing and it never will be. I’m not saying that I don’t like Vienna, it’s just that I cannot feel the same enthusiasm for it like Gabi does for example. Today just made me miss Brooklyn more in a way. And I can’t even say what it is about Vienna that bothers me…

Can’t wait for the summer…

Spent way too much time dealing with stupid-ass paperwork today, like filling out all the TRS stuff to have it ready for the consulate tomorrow. Yes, I did get the missing paper in the mail and now I have to track to the American consulate on my day off just to have the shit notarized, which would not have been neccessary if TRS had given me an extra week to do this. See, I only waited for this letter for 10 freakin’ months and then they want it back by June 30th or I can forget about it and have to request another letter (and we know what that means). Never mind that I’m going to be in NYC on July 6th and could’ve taken that paper to freakin’ TRS personally on the 7th. Or have it notarized in Brooklyn for 7 bucks at most in the Jewish office supply store accross from the DoE.

Instead, I have to go to Vienna and probably will have to pay $50 to have it notarized. Not counting what it’ll cost me to mail it registered with a return receipt. See, I’m trying to stay calm very hard…

Then I redid my NY State tax, found the bug after a couple of hours and a call to NY State (thank God for Skype) and that’s ready for mailing too. Along with a check for Brooklyn Medical Plaza as well as a copy of my last electricity bill and Meldezettel to prove that I cannot be a juror in Kings’ County (= Brooklyn). They wanted a utility bill to prove that I reside in Austria. Not that they will be able to understand it but - not my problem. I also added the Meldezettel for kicks and circled the date Aug. 26th 2008 and wrote “this is when I officially registered as a resident in my town”. Never mind that they will be like “Help, what is this paper???”. Not my problem.

After that I did some housework and cooking as well as watching an episode of Everwood (heartbreak and all) and decided that it was time to officially end two things, so I hereby officially declare

• the end of baking season 2008/09, because soon it will be too hot for apple crumble, pies and such
• the end of the big declutter 2008/09. I looked at my basement and realized that, yes, there is a difference and that I have decluttered quite a bit. I’m far from being done but actually not that far. Anyway, it’s time for a well deserved summer break. I’m planning to go back in the fall and hope that my declutter buddies Maiphone and Lucia will jioin me for that. The next season shall be the pig paper decutter.

What else? Oh yeah, I finished and mailed in the translation for Free People and hope they’ll pick me as their translator. Also I hope I’ll get whatever it is they’ll give me before I leave NY because I could really use some spending cash for the Free People store while I’m there this summer.

So that was pretty much it - tomorrow I’m off to Vienna for errands and hopefully to spend some time with a friend too.

PS: Talked to the ex because it’s his b’day today and told him how I was hoping to get that translating job for Free People gift certificates and he was like how I should get a translating job at the sports store in Baden (the one I was bitching about to everybody), so I could get gift certificates for them and buy LOTS of things. He thinks the story is hilarious and I know Maiphone will appreciate it Maybe I’ll share the story with you on another occasion

It’s like one minute I identify with one character then another. It’s all so real - the feelings of frustration, love, happiness, heartbreak. But also the irony and funny scenes and sarcastic comments.

It’s the absolute perfection of certain scenes, when, just as you think it couldn’t get any more perfect, the song “Anna Begins” by the Counting Crows starts playing and it just all makes sense.

But most of all it’s the thoughts. It’s the questions that get asked and the answers that are given. Questions that might as well be about my own life. It’s as if some aspects of my life were just being mirrored and they were asking the questions I should be asking myself and giving me the answers at the same time.

And one of tonight’s questions was pretty much: Are you happy in this relationship? Because if you’re spending more time questioning it than enjoying it….

And I guess that goes for a lot of situations. And no, I’m not enjoying it. I stopped enjoying it a while ago. And all trying to pretend it’s OK has stopped working. I just can’t let it go.

Summer hot day - brought the cruiser with me on the train and it does seem to be a conversation starter. Guess all the cyclechic-ness is starting to pay off. Dude, I don’t care where I meet guys. Too bad I was running really late this morning because I would’ve loved to keep chatting to the nice guy on the train who offered to open the door for me and commented on my bike. But - eh, not my type, so not a big deal.

Got to school too late because f***ing trains were running 20 minutes late, broke out into major sweats after entering my morning class. So much for cyclechic-ness.

Anyway. Brought bike home on the train and then rode to my favorite lake Ozean, which was deserted. I ate lunch there and then started my summer-read. I picked the book “God don’t like ugly” by Mary Monroe because it looks like I could finish it before flying to NY, where I am dying to buy “Alias Grace” by Margaret Atwood because I’ve heard so much about it. So, this “God don’t like ugly” is a total page-turner (and an easy read, although compared to Atwood anything seems easy) and if I continue at this rate I will be done in no time.

Too bad the weather changed and I had to ride home because it looked like it was going to rain. At home I corrected a quiz, then BBQed on my balcony and then I decided to make apple crumble, which was a mistake but whatever, all the apples are gone now and I declare this to be the end of this baking season. The only thing I could get myself to make at this point would be Key Lime Pie (or maybe cheesecake). Although…. less than a month before I can eat the real thing.

As I unrolled my straw mat I saw some light powdery stuff on it. It took me a bit before I realized that it was sand from when I had used that mat on the other side of the Atlantic. I must have used it just once as it looks brand new. I wonder what sand fell onto the lawn at Ozean today. Plumb Beach? Fort Tilden? Myrtle Beach? Jones Beach? Robert Moses? Sandy Hook? Or maybe even Coney Island? God, I miss the beach so much.

There are a couple of reasons why today was pretty good, like riding my cruiser to school in the cool morning air (I took the train for part of the way), or meeting Maiphone after school for a very spontaneous ride home, which turned out pretty awesome:

She actually met me closer to my starting point, where I was already cruising away - music blasting from my IPod Shuffle speaker attached to my bike, the skirt of my dress flying in the cool breeze of this otherwise hot afternoon. Big sunglasses and all other accessories for a “cyclechic” ride.

We rode until we reached Thallern where we spontaneously decided to stop for something to drink. Under the shade of the sycamore trees in the yard of this rather nice restaurant (the same that serves the legendary fried chicken) we drank a glass of white wine and pretty much enjoyed the afternoon. It felt very much like those afternoons that I would spend at Sweet Melissa’s, especially those with Stine or Thomas (or Bridget) - you know during Regents Week when you’re pretty much done with school and just need to show up there. It’s not quite like that but I’m done with tests (Maiphone is done with 12th grade exit exams) and what would be a better way to celebrate?

After sitting there for a while sort of forgetting time we cycled on to my hometown, stopped at the post office and then decided to get ice-cream because - why the hell not?

I came home to a clean apartment and an almost ready dinner that I just needed to throw in the microwave - Melitzanes Papoutsakia, one of my favorite dishes (I had prepared it yesterday) along to watching yet another episode of Everwood (crying and all).

Rounding the evening off by actually doing a little bit of schoolwork before picking up my guitar and practicing some songs.

Then stumbling over the Counting Crows‘ “When I Dream Of Michelangelo” and singing along to it really loud. Thinking how a gesture, even if so small that no other person but us would notice it can reaffirm a situation that’s somehow gotten out of balance and just seems to have found its way to the right tracks again, even though the balance is very delicate and I’ve lost some faith in it.

But for today, I’ll just think that - even if just for a brief moment - it’s OK.

P.S.: I added the song “When I dream of Michelangelo” to the playlist below. Below the cut are the lyrics, which - like everything else that comes out of Adam Duritz’ songwriting genius, pretty much amaze me. (more…)

I don’t know if it’s because I’ve finished correcting my last test of the year (and it went better than I thought) or because I’m looking forward to a 3-day-week, or because as the end of June is approaching great things are lying ahead, like parties, end of school year celebrations or maybe because slowly some plans for the summer are forming and it looks as if I might be doing some of the things I didn’t get to do last summer. Who knows… the Mojito I just made using the home-grown mint from my balcony and listening to the song “Oscar Wilde” by Company of Thieves are sure helping.

Tentatively I’m calling the summer ahead “Summer of Michi 2.0″.

All I want to do is just have a good time with the people I care about i my favorite city of the world. And right now, it all looks pretty good.

Also looking forward to: riding my cruiser to school tomorrow and back home with Maiphone

This might have been one of the most exhausting weeks in a long time - I hardly slept at all between talking to Stine on the phone and worrying about my life too much. Now it’s the weekend and I feel like I’m getting sick. Typical.

I’m still a little lost and confused. But it’s strange how little changes make such a big difference… and I wonder if the sign I was waiting for last weekend arrived a couple of days later in a different shape than what I was expecting.

Today I spoke to someone (I’ll be more specific about this as soon as it becomes more certain) about possibly performing together. And next thing I know I was sitting in front of my computer with my guitar on my lap practicing the chords of Ingrid Michaelson’s “The Chain”. I miss performing with my “band” although not as much as I used to.

Everything else is blurry now because I am just too tired to even think straight. But I wanted to post my current playlist. The song “Impossible” by the Shout Out Louds may be my favorite tune while driving my car to and from school these days. And no! It’s not depressing!

This playlist makes no sense, but I added some Regina Spektor songs like “Baobabs” to go with the lyrics I posted earlier.

It’s close to midnight and I have to get up at 6am. Plus, it’s a long day including a conference and after school duty. And, to top it all off I have to put together 2 math tests tomorrow.

Whatever. I still believe talking to Stine was totally worth it. Everything. From the bitching to the thoughts to explaining why I make the same mistakes over and over again to trying to figure out how much I am willing to invest. From talking about our friendship and my thoughts during the time we didn’t talk to laughing about our vacation in Vermont when I was ready to kill her because she had gotten me so worried. From remembering the trip we made to Philly with the cut up picture (the “after the divorce” picture, see below) to telling her how I would have never forgiven myself if anything had ever happened to her while I had been busy being mad at her. To realizing what it is that I would really like to do in this present drama-situation I happen to be in.

Then finally changing the subject and confessing to her that I suspect a particular person could have a crush or at least an interest in me. (And NO, I am not going to talk about this with anyone else, especially since I’m not even interested in this person, it’s just creeping me out! No, nobody, understand? Well at least not on my side of the Atlantic…)

And then getting all excited because the results from Deichwandern came in and we’re both still in the game. And how she has no clue who I am….

So yeah. It’s late now and I hope I’ll survive tomorrow. But so totally worth it!

PS: I’m also glad I got to bitch to Maiphone a little as well, who I’m sure has more important things on her mind than listening to my rants, so thanks, too, for the “navigation” as usual . I miss our bike rides.

PPS: This is the picture mentioned above. I like to call it the “divorce” because of the way it’s cut up. Oh yeah, the second half on the picture had Stine on it (at the Counting Crows concert in Philly in 2002) and NO, I did not cut up the picture after we stopped being friends, it was Stine who did that when she gave me the pic because apparently she looked so bad in it that she didn’t even want me to see it. So that’s the story. And I can totally laugh about it now even though at the time of our misunderstandings/fight I didn’t think it was that funny and it kind of became a symbol of that broken friendship back then. Not important now.

Time for me to post the saga that is TRS, or Teacher’s Retirement Service.

I’ve worked long enough to qualify for a small pension from the US once I retire. However, out of the 6 years that I worked in NY, I only contributed to the TRS fund for a part of the time and you need 5 years to get a pension. So I wanted to buy back the missing time - I knew I qualified to do so, all I needed was some paper stating how much money I would have to pay as a lump sum.

Early August of 2008 (!), or maybe it was even still July, I went to the TRS’ website to request a “cost letter”. Thomas had told me that the letter was just a click (and a few weeks waiting time) away. Well, the feature was “temporarily disabled” so I called TRS in the summer and (after waiting on hold forever) spoke to a very nice guy who told me my request would be processed and it should take 3-6 weeks or so. I was a little upset because I was afraid I would leave NY before the letter arrived, which was exactly what happened.

I did my change of address with TRS right before I left and silently prayed the letter would not get lost somewhere between the two addresses.

So I waited. And waited. And waited.

Sometime in October I received a letter from TRS indicating they had gotten the address change, and some time later I got a letter saying that I no longer was an active member (no shit) and that I should look at the enclosed brochure for my options what to do with the money on my account. Only there was no brochure enclosed. And I knew what I wanted to do: pay a lump sum and be vested.

When I visited NY at Christmas I called up TRS and was all friendly and like “Uhm, I’m sure the letter got lost while I was moving, could you please send a new one?”. To which the TRS lady replied, “No, it didn’t get lost.” So I was like, “No, I’m sure…” and she said, “No, it hasn’t been sent out yet”.

Oh.

So I requested the letter in August and this lady is telling me they haven’t sent it yet?

“But the person I spoke to in the summer said it would take 3-6 weeks”

“Now I don’t know why he would tell you that”

Uhm, ok.

So you can imagine my excitement when finally a letter from the TRS was in my mailbox last week. I almost peed in my pants from excitement. 10 months later they’re sending the freakin’ letter. Thank you Jesus!

But, alas, when I opened it it wasn’t what I had expected. Instead, it was a letter indicating the option to buy back 1 month and 6 days of AMMAN service for a lump sum of about $180. What? Yeah, I’m as clueless as you are. I figured that maybe this was from when I was working as a substitute and I’d just send them the check.

Until I looked closer only to discover that the letter has to be f***ing notarized! Oh and if you’re living abroad, you should go to the nearest American consulate. And if you’d ever dealt with the consulate you would understand my frustration. Plus this needs to be done by June 24th. Figures. Never mind that I’ll be in NY 2 weeks later.

The story is far from being finished.

Over the weekend I logged onto the TRS website and saw that the option to request a cost letter is working again, so I figured “What the heck, I’ll request a new one”. But it wouldn’t let me!!! Instead I got the message that I had already requested one. (no shit, in AUGUST!)

Today I received 2 more letters from the TRS. One looks just like the one from last week but this time I can buy back AMMAN credit for 18 days (wtf?) and the other one - OMG! This is it! The other letter indicates my total years of service that I can buy back. But… wait a minute… there’s no info on the amount or how to pay it.

So I called TRS today (”Your anticipated waiting time is less than 15 minutes.” Oh joy) and explained my situation about the missing letter. “Oh, it’s coming”, the guy on the phone said. I was like “What??”. Turns out it was sent the same day as the other letters and should literally be here any day now. Oh. My. God!!!

I explained my situation and said that I’d rather go to the US consulate once and not for every $90 I have to pay. The guy was very understanding but confused “Wait, how many letters did you get?” I told him about the 3 letters. Turns out the first letter was a mistake and that amount will be included in the total, which should leave me with 2 amounts to pay by June 30th (I’m going to NY July 6th! WTF).

Why they didn’t send all the 3 letters dated May 19th in one envelope remains a mystery to me.

Oh and I did call the consulate just for kicks and guess what? They make your life HELL when it’s about picking up a visa but when you need something notarized “Just come by anytime Mo-Fr 8-11.30″, which is still abitch ’cause I’ll probably have to take a day off from work for that but at this point I’ll do anything just to be done with this chapter of my life called TRS.

Gaaah!

PS: Funny thing on the side: yesterday the ex told me that NY State wanted proof that I had moved out of NY state. Meanwhile I have received a letter with a questionnaire for jury duty. Haha, hilarious!

So I’m starting to do these odd jobs. It’s not anything I had planned, it just sort of happened.

Firstly, I’ve started writing for a new website (I’m not linking to it from here for privacy reasons but will gladly tell everyone the URL). Currently there is no pay involved but there may be in the future and that would be awesome. BUT we are doing this whole giveaway-thing where basically we get to review items from various places (like Etsy stores) and then post about it on the website along with a giveaway contest. So… I got to review this item from an Etsy store - two uber-cool retro coffee cups that have the words “Freak” and “Creep” on them, which I got for free just for writing a review (I’m new to this, apparently there’s tons of people who do this on a regular basis). The cups are beyond awesome and they’re totally something I might have bought otherwise.

Secondly, my favorite store “Free People” posted an ad on their website a while ago saying how they needed translators for German for a “project” (they were very vague about it). Well, I replied and just heard back from them - apparently they are considering my (very informal) application. The “project” consists of translating parts of their website because they are planning on shipping to Europe in the future. I totally hope I get to do this, this would be so cool…
Oh yeah, the “pay”? Gift certificates for Free People. Hell, yeah! I’m spending all my money there as it is, so bring on the gift certificates!

I wonder what’s next…